SQD was born in 2025, and will be carrying over into 2026!! I don’t care if I have writer’s block, damnit, I’m not giving up on you!
But really, I just feel fresh out of words and don’t really understand why nothing is flowing from my fingertips. I have heard that this happens to writers sometimes, right before periods of abundant creativity, and I hope that this is the case. I also wouldn’t mind just a slow and soft return.
I feel like I could be potentially experiencing mild depressive symptoms. I feel like I get drained extremely easily lately, which leads me to retreating from people. I also have had the thought: “I’m unusually unhappy” a couple of times recently.
I don’t exactly know what is poking at my mood and energy levels lately, but I do miss creative writing bursts. I have instead been making beautiful pieces of jewelry, that I will add photos of here. It feels amazing to return to beaded art, as I had such a huge era with it in 2023.
Today is the first day of the new year. Today I keep grasping at something that isn’t coming into fruition. I want to be expressive, refreshed, renewed. I want to create. Instead, I feel indecisive, unable to hone in on the right thing. I think opening my laptop and encouraging myself to write, no matter what comes out on the page, is an amazing step though. Maybe this new years is meant to be gentle, meant to be subtle. I know my energy will return because it always does.
If anything, I feel grateful to know great bounds of energy. It hurts to be in creative dips because I know how incredible the other side feels. Creating is the peak of human experience, right along with connection and love.
Okay, I think I’m done for now. I’ll leave my beaded gems here. Happy new year <3
